"Go to bed with a stranger."
The year was 2013; one of my BFFs at the time was in the UK for postgraduate study; this particular one liked to brag to our circle that she could plan my assassination because of how well she knew me and could predict what I would say or do. She was rarely wrong about me. One day she and her sisters had planned this ice cream getaway with me, and when we got there, I excused myself when everyone made an order. I returned to find a particular flavor on my side of the table. I took it and started eating it. One of the ladies asked if I liked it. I said yes, it was my favorite. Everyone started laughing. One of them said my BFF was told not to order for me, but she was so confident of what I needed that she remarked she could plan my assassination. We all laughed.
Still, this particular day I sent her this message. " my love, how are you? I just want to confide in you about something. I hope you will understand. I just went to bed with a stranger. Sorry. I will never be same again. You should try it too". I sent her this message while working on a university campus where there has never been a power or water outage for over two decades. You could walk anywhere at any time of the day or night without fear of insecurity. The place has compelling and other issues that should be left unsaid, but its seductive power kept me there for nearly a decade. I can be on campus for 3-4 months and never get to the immediate community. Everything I need is on campus, and others can be sourced for me by myriads of people who assist me. My BFF said that all kinds of thoughts went through her mind on how I could have met this stranger and this would happen before we spoke. She called me back no sooner than she got my text to ask why?; who? When? And all the other questions. I was not only laughing at her, but I went further to tell her that Bishop said it, so I had to do it. While we laughed at hypertension I had almost cost her; she poked me that she was thinking in her mind about where in the geographies of my movement which she could predict with accuracy, would I have met this stranger.
What is your stranger? Consider Bishop's advice from his sermon from nearly 13years ago, "Give the Lady a hand." Through this sermon, Bishop communicates a genderless truth that we can find in the story of Ruth that is useful for people of all ages and stages. When Bishop said to go to bed with a stranger, he asked us to get out predictability, flexibility, comfort, and status quo that could impede progress. To stop doing the same thing and expecting a different outcome. He borrowed his bible text from Ruth, who went to position herself in an uncomfortable place by the foot of a man who asked her to stay in this strange place overnight. Bishop was not asking us to do illegal or immoral stuff. If you are a religious extremist that is not open to new thoughts, idioms, ideologies, and concepts, please do not listen to Bishop. Bishop was telling us that sometimes, nothing significant happens inside comfort. Bishop challenged us to take steps, embrace creativity, and occasionally disrupt our routine. On this day, Bishop drops sub for people who like to sit in the same place in the church, and if somebody sits there, they are not happy. Change your wardrobe, change your look and hairstyle. Bishop told the married to change their game in the bedroom and everyone else in the boardroom, classroom, and any other room where they work. Learn new skills, and get out of routine. Some of us are more comfortable in suya, asun, and burger shops than at the gym. The gym is that stranger; go to bed with it. PoP was asking us to challenge our normalcy.
PoP was saying get intimately connected with a world that is strange to you. Become intimate with something you used to dream about. It is when it becomes you, and you become it, that success is birth. It is no longer foreign to you. Take the risk of intimacy. Intimacy with something that was once an idea. Do not rehearse what you have already accomplished. Get out of the box. Further, he said, If you keep making yourself available to opportunity, the opportunity will cover you with its skirt( like Boaz cover Ruth). He cannot protect you if you are not there. You have to make yourself available to the next level of living. To reach your destiny, you must make yourself invisible to where you came from(history). You cannot simultaneously be available in both words. You expand your world when you expose yourself to excellence in another form. When I was done in my comfort zone and coupled that some individuals from the pit of hell chose to make my life miserable, I packed my load and was out. All the “Sanhedrin conferences” (to borrow from my friend) would not change my decision.
Now I was with my orisa and Angel, Iya Olamide (Orun Ire o), who helped me navigate this new stranger. It was fun, I must tell you. If sister-mum were alive, I would tell her to hold a master class on helping people navigate change. Lagos is not a wonderful place to be when you leave your comfort zone. From generator noise to crazy neighbors and more. I had to learn to walk and hold my bag and phone to myself when Uber was not economical for my purse. Sister-mum gave me a seminar on Lagos 101. Do not ask anyone for direction 75% do not know the way. While dating my stranger, I bought his daughter's book, "Don't settle for safe ."Everyone knows I love Sarah, Cora, and all the Jakes, but I am team, Bishop. I read Sarah better than listening to her. I suspect, like me, she speaks so fast for people who listen so slow. More so, I knew Bishop longer than Sarah.
Going to bed with my stranger.
See you in my second deposit for Bishop's Birthday.
#45 Years of ministry
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Posted on Facebook on July 19, 2022
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